Damn Epidemic!!! or (Any Day Now I Expect to Reanimate as a Zombie)

Dear friends,
there will be no cute pictures this week. There is a Flu epidemic happening in the city and your humble friend and writer has gotten it. Well, technically, they don't know if it's the Flu. They don't know if the nature of the infection is viral or bacterial. Point is that it's reached the epidemic threshold here in Saint Petersburg. And I can tell you from personal experience that it's the mother of all infections. It sucks so bad, oh my god. The first week of it is like a mild fluffy prelude because you just feel weak and tired and have a temperature and think that it's going to go away. So you keep going to work like an idiot, and eating garlic and gargling with salt water. Because that's what they do here when they're sick. They eat garlic like the disease is fucking Dracula or something. "Oh no!" screams the virus or bacteria "Not garlic! Anything but that! My skin is burning because I'm a vampire. Also, I'm afraid of sunlight." Fuck you garlic! You're fucking useless!

The second week, just as you think you're about to get all better, this bitch really gets rolling. Your glands swell up, your throat hurts because you have a tonsil infection, and your whole head fills up with "something." Don't know what it is. Safe bet that it's mucus though. You're still visited by the chills and the sweats and incredibly, amazingly, fucking mind-blowingly, eveyone still suggests that you eat lots of garlic and gargle with soda water or chamomile. Chamomile? Really Russian people? The little yellow flower is going to make THIS go away? I swear to god I almost lost all faith in this Narod. Did I mention the cold sore? Yeah, you get one of those too as a nasty little present from this "epidemic." Thanks Russian epidemic!

But then I called my trustly doctor. The same one that experimented on me before. (See post whatever for details). Anyway, he explained about the epidemic and told me to go and buy some antibiotics for this shit because everyone is hoping that it's bacterial and that antibiotics will work, him included. Yeah, my doctor has it too. Ha ha.

And you know what? Here's where my faith in the Russian people was restored. They hand out antibiotics at the pharmacy like it's fucking candy. Without a prescription and it's cheap too. And it's the same good stuff you get in the U.S. I never really got why you need a prescription for antibiotics in the first place. It's not like they get you high or anything.

So I'm keeping my fingers crossed and hoping that this shit will work. Because if the antibiotics don't cure this plague, I don't know how much longer it's going to last. It's just fucking foul is what it is. Like corpse foul.